This is what Ethan told Nathan this morning:
“Daddy, you have two choices. You can give me raisins or you can not give me raisins (Ethan had just finished eating all the raisins out of his Raisin Bran).”
Daddy says, “I’m not going to give you anymore raisins.”
Ethan replies, “That was not a good choice.”
I have been doing some major binge eating for the last 4 months. Every time I feel stressed out, or bored or think about food, I eat. That’s a lot of eating. In the interest of full-disclosure, I’ll be completely honest and tell you how much I’ve gained since March:
That’s an awful lot of weight in 4 months.
So, I’m restarting today and declaring it to the world so I can’t go back. Food really hasn’t been serving my very well. I’m still bored and feeling stress after eating a bowl of ice cream. I have this horrible addiction to high carbohydrate foods. I feel like eating so I have cookies, crackers, bread or ice cream. It spikes my blood sugar and I feel good. For about 5 minutes. Then my blood sugar crashes and I feel hungry and icky. Repeat cycle all day long. So, for a week, I’m cutting out carbohydrates that don’t serve a purpose (cookies, crackers, white bread, pure sugar desserts) and trying to increase my intake of foods that occur naturally (grow in the ground or on trees…) or have a mother.
1. Measure carefully. Un-nailing a wall is actually harder than putting it together in the first place.
2. A hammer can do some pretty serious (and painful) damage to your finger if you let it.
3. Landscaping stones make good sledgehammers if one isn’t available. And bubble bottles can be screwed to the floor to be a makeshift doorstop.
4. Ethan wants to be a builder. He wanted to go and pretend to build in his room after I stopped working for the day. Oh, and he never hits his fingers with his hammer.
5. There’s more math to building than I realized. Mostly addition and subtraction, really, but lots of it.
6. Pay attention to how much space you have when you build a wall. If, say, you build it so that the top of the wall is under the end of the bed, this makes it tricky to stand said wall up. Hypothetically, that is, Of course.
7. I can actually build a wall!
The kids and I had a fun morning. Ethan always wants to do something that requires my involvement. Most of the things he wants to do, I don’t want to do at all (Play-Doh- I hate it right now. It’s messy. It’s hard to clean up. The kids beg for it every day). So, last night as I was working on my last Bible study lesson, I decided I’d do more stuff with the kids today, but it would be stuff I planned. It worked really well. Maybe it was a God-inspired idea since it came to me while I was doing Bible study 🙂 ! So, we worked together on taking the wallpaper border off the remaining 1 1/2 walls that still had it in our bedroom. The kids thought it was great. Then I rearranged the Living Room and put a bunch of toys downstairs and the kids just played and had fun. We also danced and sang to a VBS CD that Ethan “won” at church a month ago. Ethan had the guitar, and Audrey had the mirophone. It was a rocking good time. So much more fun than saying, “no” all morning. Ahhhhh…. it was nice. I think that’s how it’s supposed to work most days. Mom and kids doing stuff together- having fun and accomplishing things at the same time!
By the way, good luck to Rachel who is on her way to Brownsville, TX for a missions trip with our youth group! I hope you have a fabulous time and that Ella and James miss you just enough to make you feel special, but not so much that everyone is miserable!
If Ethan has an “accident” during a nap or during the night, when he wakes up he finds a way to reach his underwear drawer and changes his clothes.
All by himself!
Yesterday was not fun. I started the day with a heavy heart, and by the end of the day, I had worked myself into quite a frenzy over a situation which resulted in an ugly fight with Nathan. My reaction to him was not a “proportional response”.
Writing a public blog about personal things can be tricky. The snippets that I share give a tiny window into our life. There are lots of things that are going on that I don’t talk about because I don’t feel comfortable sharing it or it just isn’t appropriate. So, this isn’t a complete representation of our lives. I often write about things that are struggles for me. That doesn’t mean that I’m in a constant state of worry, depression, defeat and frustration. It may just mean that it’s the most interesting thing to talk about. Even given the drawbacks of this format, I’ve decided that I still want to use this as a place where I can be really honest about life’s ups and downs.
So, after all that I wrote earlier about the fine line of what to share and what not to share, why would I even mention having a fight with my husband?
I’ll give you three simple reasons-
1. I’m going through a dark season right now and I need your prayers and encouragement. I already know the the proper answers and ways to do things. I just need some extra help to hold me up right now.
2. And to perhaps encourage someone else who is having a hard time by letting them know that they aren’t the only one.
3. The fight wasn’t Nathan’s fault. It was mine.
By the way, do you know how hard it is to hold on to angry feelings on a car ride when your 3 year old, keeps saying,
“Mom, I love you so much your feet stink.”
“Mom I love you so much your nose stinks.”
and my personal favorite
“Holy smokes! Look at those trees! Holy smokes!”
Is that swearing?
A&E from almost exactly a year ago!
Thanks for praying. One of the situations has been resolved. I’m very grateful(and I should probably call my husband and tell him about it)!
Keep praying about the other situation regarding the Bible Study issue. I don’t want to run on out ahead of God and mess things up and due to the nature of this I need to tread lightly. Thank you, thank you!
Could y’all pray for me today? I’m dealing with a couple of different church situations that are really weighing on me and I’m not sure how to deal with them. One of the issues I started out handling very poorly and I’m still feeling badly about it even though I’ve asked for forgiveness from the person I “offended” (I can’t think of a better word). Part of the problem is that there is a situation that needs to be addressed and the lack of resolution is having an impact on our family. I’m sorry to be mysterious about it, but I don’t know that adding more details would help.
The other thing is that I’ve agreed to lead one of the women’s Bible Studies this fall. I started out excited about it. Then I became very apprehensive. Then I started to feel better about it. Well, I’m back to apprehensive. It’s not the study itself, it’s some surrounding issues that are weighing on me.
I’m letting the kids run around the house with crackers and cookies right now. There, I’ve admitted it. I don’t always make my kids eat their snacks at the table. I know it’s something I should work on sometime, but I don’t have the energy today and they aren’t gong to hell over it, so I don’t care!
Back to the request for prayer. I could really use it. I need some wisdom and direction and I just feel like crying.